Memo To New Orleans...

The 2007 NFL season has started.

Perhaps their copy of the memo was sent to Houston on accident? They sure came to play as they're 2-0 and the offense has only given up two sacks in two weeks.

The Saints, on the other hand, have only scored two touchdowns in as many weeks - with zero of them being by star running back Reggie Bush. Fresh off of a loss to the Jeff Garcia-led Buccaneers, the Saints are looking lifeless on offense as well as defense which can be seen by the 40-year old Joey Galloway looking like Jerry Rice against them.

So what is the problem? Let's break down a few possible reasons for the slow start that has the Saints 27th overall in points scored. (And if you're the curious type, Houston is 8th)

1) No Home Games

The Saints are 0-2 thus far, but have yet to play a game at home. After playing Indianapolis on the opening night of the NFL season, the league threw them a bone and let them play the Bucs - coming off of a 4-12 season. But with the game on the road, the Saints obviously missed their home-field advantage: "F*** Da Eagles" Heather.

They'll get to come back to the dome this week as Tennesee Titans come to town. This will bring two of the biggest second-year stars in Vince Young and Bush, likely making quite the montage on ESPN.


2) Kim Kardashian

With Reggie Bush having a busy off-season frolicking around with David Beckham, Ciara and Kim Kardashian, the first two likely didn't impact him negatively. The other has a solid chance as she's not exactly Mrs. Clean.

While some athletes choose to take risks by riding motorcycles, Bush decides to take his chances with Hepatitus. Hey Reggie, and ACL heals itself. The Hep's here to stay. "It's like luggage."

Perhaps the Saints can get an adendum written into his contract.




3) Not landing Mario Williams

Last season's draft saw the Texans make one of the more surprising moves of the year by inking defensive Mario Williams to a deal with Bush (and Vince Young, for that matter) still available. Well, as the season stands, Williams has six tackles, two sacks and touchdown on a 38-yard fumble return. With Williams having one touchdown to Bush's zero, the Texans are obviously geniuses. Bush, on the other hand, has only 65 yards rushing on the whole season - making New Orleans look downright silly for their drafting of the former Trojan...which takes us back to #2. Wrap it up, Reginald.


4) Joe Horn's Obviously a Witch Doctor

After the Saints failed to re-sign the veteran receiver, Horn went to the media to diclaim his unhappiness. While he didn't go as far to place a curse on them, you can't tell me that this dude doesn't have a Sean Payton voodoo doll at home. Or a real doll. Or both. But I digress.

Horn gave many, many seasons for the black and gold, and while he ain't what he used to be, he was a big part in the revivial of the franchise. Meanwhile, while Horn is attempting to play at the "Pro Bowl Level," his Atlanta Falcons also 0-2. Quite a coincidence, if you ask me.


So, take your pick. Don't feel like you have to limit it to just one. There's obviously something wrong with the Saints, it's just a matter of figuring out who's to blame. (Cough Kardashian Cough)